NINE O' CLOCK IN THE MORNING

Saturday 23th March 2013, 9 o'clock in the morning

Why was this day different from any other....

I have always felt somehow different from other people, observing everything that happen around me but never quite feeling fully part of it. Back then, I used to think a lot, I was isolated from everyone, living in my own world, walking everywhere with my headphones on, visiting cafés alone with my sketchbook a draw and draw and draw. I felt quite empty. There were so many unanswered questions. The feeling that nothing fills me up haunted me and it was harder and harder to sleep when you're empty inside. And I had noone to talk to. I needed someone to take me on a journey through the life.

I hate that feeling when you’re not necessarily sad, but you just feel really empty and every little thing gets to you and everyone that talks to you makes you angry and you want to punch everyone in the face.

"Never tell your problems to anyone, twenty percent don't care and the other eighty percent are glad you have them." - well this is sad true, but I would say that there's like one percent apart from that and that includes your family and superclose friends.

A secret is a secret only if you don't tell anyone. People often tell me their secrets. It's like I have a big fat imaginary sign on my head "tell me your secrets." But anyways, I treasure the fact that I'm helping others by just listening to them. Without any judgement. They know for sure the secret is safe and sound with me and I appreciate that. I don't care about god damn stupid gossips and it is really not necessary for me to know every dirt on everyone. A world so hateful some would rather die than be who they are.

But on the other hand, I don't talk about myself much because it's hard for me to trust people and to open up. All I kept doing was asking myself how weird is that, how weird am I. Maybe I'm just a fucking alien, that would explain a lot.

It was 9 o'clock in the morning and I woke up(bambillion hours before my alarm was actually set, because I am a lazy piece of s%!@t on a regular basis ). After rubbing my eyes I looked through the window. And I felt so different. The sun was so warm and the birds were singing. I know this might sound stupid but... all of the sudden, somehow I felt so unfuckingbelievably happy. I could not understand why am I feeling like that.  That day I just stopped fucking care about everything for a while. And you know what? It feels divinely. The less you give a fuck, the happier you'll be, trust me.


So basically, that's the story of how I took all these stupid selfies and right after that "raped" the Youtube play button of Louis' video What a wonderful world.  And most importantly I saw the world from a different point of view. This is one of my days to remember- Saturday 23th March 2013, 9 o'clock in the morning. 

 And then I found these lovely old polaroid photos my mom took when were just three innocent bambinos. 

After that my friends and I went to Dyzajn Market. It was so cold that I thought for a second I'd seriously become an ice sculpture. So after few minutes of walking miserably around and taking pictures of well dressed strangers, we ended up in a long queue so as to buy one hell overprized hot nutella pancake. Totally worth it.

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